Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – September 2, 2004

Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – September 2, 2004

 Things I Don’t Like

Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – September 2, 2004 – Just as I’m getting fired up to write about things I don’t care for, I see an article about auctions on e-bay. I felt compelled (reason unknown) to read it and instantly found another thing to add to my burgeoning list.

People (idiots) are actually buying the used, discarded chewing gum of pop star Britney Spears. Is it possible that they have no lives? Having a fairly good perspective on my own value, it’s entirely possible that I have no appreciation for the worship of celebrity. However my common sense tells me that the thousand of dollars spent on used chewing gum could have been used to better advantage to feed an under-privileged child somewhere in the world, to fight cruelty to animals or to fund a worthwhile charity.

NOT 1

Call me crazy! Now I’ve got that of my chest, I need to remember that there will alway be certain things that bother, annoy or frustrate me. From my correspondence with Patrick, these are some of the things that really succeeded in getting my nickers in the proverbial twist:

Cruelty – stupidity – rap music – labels – dripping water.

Line-ups – lazy people – chauvinistic men – greed.

Women who play at being “helpless”.

Watching the nature channel when the lion is chasing the zebra.

People who litter – Walmart – bad parents – the Metric system.

Government patronage – reality TV – being called “Ma’am”

Loud music in restaurants – bright lights anywhere.

People who demean one another in public.

Stingy people – white bread – bus ads.

Drivers who refuse to let another car merge into traffic.

Birds in cages – people who swagger – dull scissors.

Seeing dogs chained in a yard – regardless of the weather.

People who talk or kick your seat in the movies.

Printer paper jams – pot holes – organized religion.

Ironing – breaking a wine glass from a great set.

NOT 5

Loud motor boats on a quiet lake.

Companies who question a legitimate warranty.

Label conscious people – insincere apologies.

Lack of political accountability.

Rude staff in a retail store – red traffic lights.

Arrogant doctors.

Tangled up wire coat hangers – wasted food – cigars.

NOT 4

Adults yelling at little children (especially in public).

Self-important people – beer or coffee breath.

Fax ads in the middle of the night.

Christmas excess – soot – messy people.

Pens that blob ink on a great card.

Library books with the last chapter missing.

Unfinished arguments with friends.

People who are never satisfied.

Bitter coffee.

Smashed Halloween pumpkins & discarded Christmas trees.

Snoring – misogyny – light bulbs that break off in the socket.

Ice pellets and black ice.

Vertical blinds – giant baby strollers – TV commercials.

Bicyclists on sidewalks and one way streets.

Dust on my computer screen.

Mornings.

NOT 2

Parents who give kids too many toys and not enough love.

Dull knives – inadvertently boiling a pot dry.

Knotted up garden hoses.

People who don’t do the right thing.

Constant complaining about the weather.

Off-leash dogs – not the dogs – the owners.

Wearing winter boots.

Cleaning up after a dinner party.

These are just some of my pet peeves. Not that any of these in isolation should be the cause of a bad day, lumped together – any number of them can be annoying – but if that’s the biggest thing I have to deal with during the course of any given day – life just ain’t that bad!