Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – October 1, 2004

 Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – October 1, 2004

What’s Next?

Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – October 1, 2004 – Well – here it is – October the first. I had an appointment today with Frank at three o’clock to discuss the development of my new Web Site. It’s now six-thirty and I haven’t heard from him yet. I last spoke with him on Thursday and he was going to either call or e-mail me with a meeting place.

However, as it turned out, he was tied up in meetings, and I was at the dentist’s office from ten-thirty this morning until three o’clock this afternoon. We’re going to meet tomorrow afternoon instead. I’m looking forward to this because I think Frank and I are on the same wavelength with respect to ideas for this project.

 This development of my WebSites has made me think a lot about my overall business – planning, organization, goals and time lines. I took Larry’s advice, and yesterday I called “Coach Almighty” for a chat. As it turns out, he won’t be my guy. To be part of his flock one must be earning over half a million dollars a year, and I’m not quite there – almost of course, but just a wee bit shy of the mark.

I could however be part of his secondary program – the one for those of us not yet in the higher echelons of life. He was extremely pleasant and we chatted about “all work – no play, guilt, resentment, money and being proactive as opposed to reactive”. He asked me two questions and suggested that I think about them. “What do I want?” and “How am I going to get there?” Right out of the blocks I thought- “It will be difficult for me to earn more money and I have no idea what I want”. Is it any wonder that life is a struggle for me?

 After I spoke with coach man, I decided that the sky wouldn’t fall if I didn’t spend the day in front of my computer, so I jumped into my car – well actually I slid gracefully in behind the wheel – and sped up the Don Valley Parkway to Highway 7 and zoomed along eastbound to old main street in Unionville. I walked around in the sunshine, bought a forty pound bag of wild birdseed (which I wisely left at the store until I was finished shopping) and then sat down at an outdoor patio to have lunch and think about Coach Almighty’s advice.

I had brought along some lime green paper to write on and I felt brave and inspired. I was going to do battle with the fiendish naysayers in my mind. And did I ever show them. Half way through lunch my first sheet of paper was still blank. With salmon wrap, capers and sweet red onions wrestled to the ground, I took pen firmly in hand, and buoyed up by a cup of coffee and a lemon tart – I got down to business. A couple of hours later I had a list of what I want in life. I don’t believe any of it’s possible but I’ve got the damn list.

Now to the meaty issue – “How do I get there?” With “Coach Almighty” just out of my reach, I’ll have to muddle along on my own for awhile. I am using this slow time well – getting supremely organized – having this dastardly dental work finished so I’ll be equipped with my dazzling thousand watt smile – planning my new marketing materials and trying not to worry about all the silly things that tend to occupy my mind on any given day. Actually, I am making some progress – I’m thinking.

You laugh, but it’s hard to move away from all the old patterns, especially if you’re like me and suffer from panic disorder, anxiety and various and sundry neuroses. The interesting thing is that I’m hopeful. Not that you’d necessarily believe it, with all my ups and downs, but I am. Inside, just under my skin, is this dynamite woman just itching to get out.

I think she has a better chance now than at any other time in my life, because I’m open to change. I’m curious to see how far I can take my life with a new attitude, some new business ideas, and a realization that I both want and need, to alter my personal life. So, what’s next – an adventure in the making – a challenge to the status quo and a future filled with endless possibilities. I’m about to become the mistress of my domain – how exciting!