Paging Dr. Palmer

Paging Dr. Palmer

An Open Letter To Dr. Walter Palmer With Some Questions

Paging Dr. Palmer –  For heaven’s sake Walt – the whole world is looking for you. You seem to have disappeared the same way that Melissa Bachman did awhile ago amidst her unfortunate little dust up over “lion killing”. Here is her photo in case you two haven’t met. I think she has a bow too – so you’d have so much to talk about. You know arrows and string tension and hide piercing capability and how you can “nail an unfortunate playing card” from 6 miles away.

My goodness the conversation would just be tingling with excitement. You could invite Kendall Jones to tea and maybe old Teddy Nugent – wow what a foursome. Fireside chats about killing and death and guns and bows and safari trips and stuffed animals and bear-skin rugs and trophy rooms and record books and more death and hunting and bravery and hacking off heads and how crazy the “greenies” are. I’m just dizzy with the thrill of it all – the fun you 4 would have!

Paging Dr. Palmer (I’m just going to keep paging you during this little story in the hope you get the message) – but I’m guessing that you may be tied up with a PR firm and an embarrassment of lawyers for some dazzling reputation repair lessons and a nice, little analysis of your legal rights – in case Interpol or the authorities from Washington or Zimbabwe come a calling.

Anyway Waltie – (may I call you Waltie) – here is the text of your letter to your valued patients. You struck such a nice tone – full of gentle concern, caring, passion and family.  That’s a really nice touch. I think it’s a good thing that you steered clear of religion and politics – because – wow – those issues can be pretty explosive in these days of a black President in the White House, that silly, silly issue of climate change, debates about gun control, immigration and gay marriage. But I digress – we really want to focus on the two salient facts here – that you killed a beloved, world-famous lion and nothing is your fault.

Paging Dr. Palmer

July 28, 2015

To my valued patients:

As you may have already heard, I have been in the news over the last few days for reasons that have nothing to do with my profession or the care I provide for you. I want you to know of this situation and my involvement.

In addition to spending time with my family, one of my passions outside dentistry is hunting. I’ve been a life-long hunter since I was a child growing up in North Dakota. I don’t often talk about hunting with my patients because it can be a divisive and emotionally charged topic. I understand and respect that not everyone shares the same views on hunting.

In early July, I was in Zimbabwe on a bow hunting trip for big game. I hired several professional guides and they secured all proper permits. To my knowledge, everything about this trip was legal and properly handled and conducted.

I had no idea that the lion I took was a known, local favorite, was collared and part of a study until the end of the hunt. I relied on the expertise of my local professional guides to ensure a legal hunt.

I have not been contacted by authorities in Zimbabwe or in the U.S. about this situation, but will assist them in any inquiries they may have.

Again, I deeply regret that my pursuit of an activity I love and practice responsibly and legally resulted in the taking of this lion. That was never my intention.

The media interest in this matter – along with a substantial number of comments and calls from people who are angered by this situation and by the practice of hunting in general – has disrupted our business and our ability to see our patients. For that disruption, I apologize profoundly for this inconvenience and promise you that we will do our best to resume normal operations as soon as possible. We are working to have patients with immediate needs referred to other dentists and will keep you informed of any additional developments.

On behalf of all of us at River Bluff Dental, thank you for your support.

Sincerely,

Walter J. Palmer, DDS
River Bluff Dental

Paging Dr. Palmer

So this is what is important here – in your words:

1)   You were in Zimbabwe on a bow hunting trip for big game.

2)   You hired professional guides who secured all the proper permits. 

3)   As far as you knew, everything about this trip was legal and properly handled and conducted.

4)   You had no idea that the lion you took was a known, local favorite.

5)   That he was a collared animal.

6)   That he was part of a study until the end of the hunt.

7)   You relied on the expertise of your local professional guides to ensure a legal hunt.

Wow – that’s great Dr.Palmer. The sticky wicket here is that Cecil the stunning black-maned lion, a local favourite and world famous icon is dead and your little fingers are all over the killing. I’ll just put Cecil’s picture here in case you don’t recognize him because the last time you saw him – he’d been skinned, beheaded and his carcass tossed in the dust. Hardly sounds like the king of the jungle any more does he?Anyway I’m sure you have photos aplenty and videos and such.

This Was Cecil – Beautiful Wasn’t He?

I Can Totally Understand Why You Wanted To Hack Off His Head And Stick It On Your Wall

Paging Dr. Palmer

Now where was I – oh yes I need to focus here. I must look up the definition of “fair chase” – that’s hunting talk. So off I went to Wickipedia – so many words and definitions but this one seemed sort of helpful.

The principles of the fair chase have been a part of the American hunting tradition for over one hundred years. The role of the hunter-conservationist, popularised by Theodore Roosevelt, and perpetuated by Roosevelt’s formation of the Boone and Crockett Club – has been central to the development of the modern fair chase tradition.

Oh Gosh – I’ll Try One More Time …

 Paging Dr. Palmer!